Heartbreak

I’m a firm believer in love can break a heart. I believe that in that short moment someone experiences the loss of something they truly love it causes the heart to break. Be it a partner, a relative, or a pet.

The emotional loss, the depression that comes with it. Whatever age you are, in my view it is possible to experience it in some shape or form. Whether a child who loses his favourite toy – in their sense they think of it alot, asking for it, unable to understand where it has gone – my friends child did this and it was awful to see, for a month he asked for and cried for a toy that he had lost. To a person who loses their pet or maybe an adult who loses their life long partner.

People laugh and do not take the youth seriously when they’re inlove. They say “you cant be inlove at that age” I do believe they’re wrong – can you remember being young? Your first love, whether you see now it may not have been love as you experience. But it was love no less, the hurt you felt when it ended.

There are people who say they felt physical pain; experienced heart attacks because of that heartbreak. I believe once upon a time I experienced it. Perhaps it was just simple panic attacks and depression, however I don’t believe it could have been entirely.

There is a scientific reasoning behind it; According to the Mayo Clinic

Broken heart syndrome is a temporary heart condition brought on by stressful situations, such as the death of a loved one. People with broken heart syndrome may have sudden chest pain or think they’re having a heart attack. These broken heart syndrome symptoms may be brought on by the heart’s reaction to a surge of stress hormones. In broken heart syndrome, a part of your heart temporarily enlarges and doesn’t pump well, while the remainder of the heart functions normally or with even more forceful contractions.

The condition was originally called takotsubo cardiomyopathy. Today, it’s also referred to as stress cardiomyopathy, stress-induced cardiomyopathy or apical ballooning syndrome. The symptoms of broken heart syndrome are treatable, and the condition usually reverses itself in about a week.

There are the five stages of heartbreak – which are the  Five stages of Grief these are;

  1. Denial – The refusal to accept what has happened.
  2. Anger – Whether angry at yourself or others, you may flip like a switch and hit out at anyone – even those who they have close relationships with.
  3. Bargaining – The trying to be in their life in some shape or form – being friends or trying to ‘bump’ into them by ‘accident’ of course if you have lost to death this isn’t possible.
  4. Depression – The feeling of emotional detachment, here comes sadness, regret and fear. During this stage people may comfort eat or drink. Perhaps even more serious things such as suicide or self harm happens in this stage. However the reality is starting to kick in.
  5. Acceptance – the upward stage, finally accepting it is over, the person is gone. Although not neccessarily happy for a long time it is the new beginning.

The stages do not need to be in order, and I personally feel I am proof of this. My relationship ended and due to personal reasons I skipped the 2nd stage – anger.  Infact I went through my break up with the man I once loved; Denial, Depression, Barganing, Acceptance, Anger. I am in the anger stage now I think. Although I accepted it – infact it was I, who ended it. I’ve been stuck in the anger for months. Angry at what happened.

But a friend once told me something, I’ll remember it for life, and I tell people it often.

“It’ll be okay in the end. If it’s not okay. It’s not the end.”

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